Monday, February 1, 2010

A Tour Of The Barn With Sofie

A Tour Of The Barn With Sofie

Translated by Meghan

Photos by Meghan

Hi, my name is Sofie and I'll be your tour guide on this fine afternoon. Or evening, or whenever you people decide to read this. Whatever. I do expect to be compensated (yeah, I know me some big words) with treats. Nothing too sugary. I'm watching my figure, k thanx.

First, let's stop by My Stall. I have My very own Stall in the barn, it's very nice. I go in there at night or sometimes I stay in if it's very cold or wet or windy (or if the ditzy lady who cleans the stalls thinks it's icy in the pasture). I get My Grain and My Supplements in My Stall. I get a special grain called Nutrena Quik, 'cause apparently real grain is bad for me. I also get a Vitamin Supplement, a Joint Supplement, and a Please Calm Down Already supplement. It tastes like a vanilla milkshake. Mmmmmm. It does help me calm down, but I can still gallop whenever I want to. I try not to gallop when Meghan rides me, 'cause she gets scared and then jumps over my head, which is pretty freaky. I mean, she could kick me in the head, or something. Very dangerous. Anyway, here's My Stall.

Sometimes late at night my friend Piper, who thinks she's so great just because she's half Friesian (big ugly black horse with hairy legs) will stick her head through her window and look at me standing in My Stall. And she will squeal at me and be all "Get away from My Stall" and I will be all "You get away from My Stall, Piper". Once we did that very late at night and woke Judy up (Judy owns the barn and all the Stalls, even My Stall) so she came down to the barn and shut Piper's window.

Here is the Aisle where you get brushed and tacked up (ugh). Mostly it's pretty boring, but sometimes I get to watch Other Horses being tacked up (ha, Piper, you have to get Ridden sometimes too. Neener, neener!) and once I saw People bringing Hay in! Very exciting, except they never dropped any bales where I could reach them. Too bad.

After you get your Tack on (gross) you have to go somewhere to get Ridden. A lot of times in winter (cold, cold, ugh, ugh) I have to get Ridden in the Indoor Arena. Here it is. It is small. And dark. And boring. I like to run around loose in the Indoor Arena, but I do not like to get Ridden there. Too boring.

Sometimes I get Ridden Outside. I like it Outside, especially on the Trail. But it's nice in the Yard, too. Especially when Meghan turns me toward the Barn. I looooooove the Barn so much, I always try to get there even faster. But not too fast, 'cause like I said, I do not want Meghan jumping over my head again. Crazy human.

See, there is me being Ridden Outside. And there is the Barn. I love you, Barn!

Also Outside is the Mares' Pasture. That's where we go to get our Hay and Fresh Air and Exercise (but not too much of that, 'cause otherwise we might strain ourselves). I like to stand in the sun and watch the stupid Geldings gallop around like big dumb stupid idiots. Except for Bud. Bud is a Western Pleasure horse. He never gallops, it's against his religion, or something. Whatever.

There's me (the lovely petite pinto behind the fence), Jessie (the big spotty one with no tail, how weird is that?!) and Piper. Piper is the Boss Mare, because she is half big ugly black horse with hairy legs (as I mentioned before) and because she likes to kick. A lot. So me and Jessie were like "Sure, whatever, Piper. If it means that much to you. Just stop kicking us already!"

So that's it. Hope you enjoyed the photos Meghan took and my stimulating color commentary (I know big phrases, too). Treats can be deposited into My Feeder in My Stall, or directly into My Mouth.

1 comment:

  1. Isn't that funny how no matter where you are the moment you are turned towards the barn their homing device kicks in and they speed up.